Job Wanted

Hey, people ask for donations on their blogs, right?

I need a job. Cuz this one is toast. Co-worker officially resigned yesterday, giving two weeks notice. The word came back that when BigKahuna read the email, someone from our office was there and reported that BK's only concern was the the"two weeks" part cuz Co-Worker has been here ten years. The rules here say she should have given a month's notice (who does that???? this place is crazy). And that was only a passing concern. No "why is she leaving with no job?" Boss is cleaning his office, and leaves here today at 3P. He will be in Italy for the next two weeks with his wife, completely unreachable.

That leaves me; the Picture Bitch. The Newsletter Bitch. The "We have you over a barrel now, you attitudinous little black girl, and we are going to ride you stupid" Bitch. Yeh - I think NOT. Plus, I don't really like The Others. It wouldn't be too bad if Vampyre wasn't here, but she's got a thing for me and it's only going to get worse because The Others can't/won't rein her in.

I had delivered the proof to the woman I had promised it to... it had to be run past the Vampyre (why??? the bitch is not officially the Art Director!) and so I emailed a PDF to her. When word came back through the client that perhaps "you can try moving the logo here," I did, in two different ways and emailed PDFs again.

Then Co-Worker's departure became public knowledge. Here comes Vampyre... who had not uttered a word nor thrown a glance my way the entire day (and I sit catty corner to her along a cube divider) to tell me the proofs looked fine. Then she noticed that I had last year's document on my desk, and that all I had done for this year was update the typeface and change the color. Nothing else. So she had fucked with it (having me change the logo around) for no good reason, cuz it wasn't my design. HA HA! But then, she loads me up with two other things that need to be done. And mind you... the word had come down that my boss was not to accept requests like that.

So um, was HE not supposed to accept any work???? Or the *department???? Either way, it's bogus.

Then next, I get an email from BigBird requesting my help to locate a photo. "Sure" I write back, "of whom and when?". "I'll have to find out" she writes back.


I left for the day.

But I need a new job. I want a job where I count towards something. A museum. A not-for-profit. Product development. I have tons of experience in several different areas, but I want to be a graphic designer, because that is what I LOVE doing. I love paper, the feel of it, the weight of it, the sound. I love the way good type lays on a page. I also love colors - all colors though I tend to more primary hues on my own. I don't need a lot of money. I need enough to live on, certainly, and mo' money makes me mo' happy, but for a frame of reference... I once walked off an $80K a year job with HedgeFund company because I couldn't live like that anymore... couldn't be like those people, nor did I want to aspire to be. So money isn't what I'm looking for.

In all honesty, I'm much better suited as a freelancer, someone to work on something specific. I do best where there is order and structure. I like rules. Doesn't mean I won't try to break them--particularly if they don't make any sense... but I'm OK with rules being there. But the bottom line is I have mondo student loans and leftover credit card debt from when I was in school, and I need to pay that stuff down. Regularly. Cuz I don't like being in debt. And I have a Sun who's karate and violin lessons ain't free.

Taking off only the names of places I've worked, this is what I've done:

Professional Experience
Graphic Designer, Marketing & Communications 2007
  • Design and create medical forms for hospital departments
  • Maintain weekly employee newsletter, including setting up documents, selecting and
    retouching photography, preparing files for print production and online publication.
  • Photographer for hospital events
Freelance Graphic Designer 1994 - 2007
  • Medical Conference brochure for WellKnownHospital
  • Designed and wrote web presence for historical Harlem church.
  • Designed theme and identity theme of retail operation. Designed interior decor.
  • Created, designed and wrote business and promotional campaign; in-store advertising.
  • Developed corporate identities and marketing materials for various businesses such
    as restaurants, corporate office services and personal trainers.
Manager, Client Services 2000-2001
HedgeFundAminCompany, New York City

Support Technician 2000
DotComCompany (one of the last) New York City

LAN Support Specialist 1996-2000
LargeInvestmentFirm, New York City

Manager, LAN Customer Service 1994-1996
WellKnownCableNetwork, New York City

Sales Assistant, Coordinator New Business Development 1988-1994
Various WellKnownCableNetworks and A Radio Station in the
advertising sales area. Worked directly with account executives to service agency clients.
Created sales presentations in PowerPoint and Freelance Graphics for use by salespeople.

• Proficient on Mac & Windows OS.
• Photoshop, Quark Express, Illustrator, ImageReady, CorelDraw, PowerPoint.
• Pre-press skills.
• HTML/XML/CSS; JavaScript and VB Script, Macromedia Homesite.
• Project and budget management.
• Excellent writing skills.
• Oral and interpersonal communication skills.

• Microsoft Official Curriculum toward an MCSE.
• Novell Administration.
• Advanced work with MS Office/Outlook 2000 and higher, including
technical expertise as a Microsoft product administrator and support technician.
• Black and white darkroom experience, digital photographic technical experience.

Pratt Institute, New York City
AOS, Graphic Design
AOS, Illustration
School of Visual Arts, New York City
Graphic Design, Continuing Ed 1994-2001

I also type superfast and believe in spellcheck.

While I was in school I had various part time jobs which aren't on there, but they generally tended to be retail sales or data entry type stuff.

If you read my blog frequently, you already know I have an attitude. You already know I'm crazy. You may not want to hire me, but consider this:

I don't do drugs, and I rarely drink. I'm loyal as hell. I'm honest. I work hard and obsess over the things that interest me. I know how to listen to a client, and deliver what is requested--not what I think they should have. (This is a big deal, I think, because I hate designers who sell people on stuff that they don't really need, simply because the designer gets off on it.) I make deadlines.

So.... if you think you know of something I may be good at, or want to see more samples of what I do (you can see the few things I've put up here by searching the tags "Sometimes I Draw" or "I Design Stuff") drop me a line at



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