Ground Control to Major Tom

Ground Control to Major Tom
Take your protein pills
and put your helmet on

The Date's phone had got cut off about 9AM last Thursday, and for two whole days my phone didn't buzz once. Not one message. And I missed those messages... and was mad at myself because I did. After the fireworks on Friday I started getting messages again. And was annoyed at myself because I was happy about it. But... instead of trying to cover how I felt I just admitted to the need... and was happy to hear that it was apparently mutual.

Ground Control to Major Tom
Commencing countdown,
engines on
Check ignition
and may God's love be with you
(Ten, Nine, Eight, Seven, Six, Five, Four, Three, Two, One, Liftoff)

On Saturday past, the SelfDefense Sensei at the Yonkers dojo had invited all the kids to come up to his home for a barbecue and overnight stay. He was going to take the kids to a drive-in movie and his country club the next day. I was surprised when the Sun said he wanted to go. It turned out that all of the kids declined the stay over, but BigSensei offered that the Sun could stay with him and his family overnight when they got home. So I told the Date (once we were back in text contact) that I had a free night. And that I wanted to go down to Gonzalez y Gonzalez to go salsa dancing. It was the first dojo function I've ever missed... I felt a little guilty about it, too. And a little strange cuz normally any chance I had to spend with certain people, I jumped on. The Sun was fine about it though... but he had mentioned it to his father, my new best freind.

So that meant I had to have a conversation with TF assuring him that I knew the family fairly well, was comfortable with the Sun staying over and had to point out that they weren't leaving the state or flying in an airplane for five hours.

I lingered until the kids were about to leave, and got on the bus that crosses the Bronx and went to Target. The Date and his son met me there ("Hey what are YOU doing here!" his little one asked.)

This is ground control to Major Tom
You've really made the grade

And the papers want to know whose shirts you wear

Now its time to leave the capsule if you dare

I had found a dress that I really liked and briefly wondered if I could afford it. It was only $40, but I really couldn't afford it. The Date bought it. I texted the Professor on the sly that I should probably give some up cuz he bought me a dress. Just to chuckle about it. The fact is it took me off guard and made me blush. We dropped his son off and came back to the Rock to unpack, making plans to go out later... the Professor also wanted to go so we were going to go get her. We almost didn't go anywhere....
...but then on top of everything else I discovered I'd left one of my bags in Target... the one with the catfood, the fabric softener and the Oxyclean, drat it. I had to go back. Target closed at 10P, it's clear on the other side of the Bronx from me and we had to get there before we went to get the Professor, which meant I was dressed... We made it there in time and he took my receipt and ran in... calling me from the aisles to make sure he picked up the items from the shelves while I waited in the car. I told him later how much I appreciated that... he said "but you were dressed and had shoes on" as if were the most logical thing in the world.

Sounds corny... but truly stuff like this is the way to my heart.

This is Major Tom to ground control
I'm stepping through the door

We couldn't get into several places downtown, including G&G. Apparently it was "No tall brownskinned Puerto Ricans in White T's" night down there, which wouldn't have been quite so annoying if there were other types of folks hanging around in T's and flipflops but whatever. We found a spot that had a live cover band playing, and lots of very drunk college kids flopping around. The Professor was not really in her element, but me, tequila makes everything better and plus I spent the '90's jumping around in places like that, so I was good. The Date is also comfortable most places it seems, and after some Hennesy and OJ was heard loudly singing to a cover of U2's "Still haven't found what I'm looking for". We ended up barhopping to several other places and then ended up in this spot the Date's brother works in, a hookah bar. It was packed. Very strange little place... but again, I'm good anywhere there's tequila. At about 4A we headed home, getting from SoHo to upper Harlem in about 8 minutes (the Professor said every so often "I want to live, people"... but I got a huge and secret kick out her not being in control of the wheel for a change), and then to the Rock in about 12. Cuz he drives--that's what he does.

And I'm floating in a most peculiar way
And the stars look very different today

We got up to go get his son (Wildman), and then I called BigSensei and met him in a diner in the Bronx to pick up my Sun...

and it's pretty much been a blur since then.

For here
Am I sitting in a tin can
Far above the world
Planet earth is blue
And there's nothing I can do...

I told Nene "you know I have something to tell you, right?" and he ignored me for a minute, but then came back to ask "So... you were free all Saturday huh?"
"And you hung out?"
"Yup, with my sister and my friend".

At which point he wanted to know all sorts of crazy shit, rapidfiring questions at me. One of them being "But I'm bigger than him, right?" I wanted to reply "Dude, he's 7 feet tall, and you're 3 feet tall... you do the math". But I'm a lady, despite the fact that I talk a lot of shit, and I merely said "I'm not answering any of those questions, because they are irrelevant".

Which is really funny, cuz apparently they are quite relevant. Why do guys do that? What are you supposed to say? Tell the truth or lie? Why would I stroke your ego at this point?

At the same time I was getting texts quoting sections of this blog. Now... I'm an honest chick. And I'm not going to stop being honest. Worst case there may be stuff I may now not feel comfortable writing, since I know I now have an (avid) new reader, but what the hell. I doubt it. Honesty, however painful, is a much simpler route for me. But at that moment it was a little unnerving, and I was definitely stressed there for a minute.

And just since I'm on the topic... this is why I'm an all-or-nothing chick. Cuz when push comes to shove I'm of the mindset that "anything he can do, I can do better... " but funny thing... most guys don't really like that. And I end up dodging questions comparing one to the other.

At that moment I chose to listen to a voicemail from TF, asking more questions about the weekend prior and whether the Sun had called in to report to me or not... something dumb. I texted back a short answer, and haven't heard from him since. (Reminds me he still hasn't told me the Sun's return flight plan....)

I was convinced that I was going to explode from the stress and that the Date and Nene would both catch attitudes but Nene really has no say in the matter since he's back with Babymama anyway, and the Date, well...

Though I'm past one hundred thousand miles
I'm feeling very still
And I think my spaceship knows which way to go
Tell me wife I love her very much she knows

...I've renamed him The Tomcat. It was gonna be Alleycat, but Alleycats tend to be wilder and slightly scruffier, whereas Tomcats, well...
  • they have several different places they go for food and scratching.
  • they know they're pretty and will clean themselves up once in a while.
  • they keep odd hours.
  • they sleep an awful lot.
  • they will stay for long periods of time before getting up one day and disappearing for long periods of time.
  • you can get awfully attached to a Tomcat and make the mistaken assumption that you've tamed them.
And the thing is, (yeah, you guessed it) I'm already attached. I rather like the company, and the scratching. And stuff. And nice things being picked up along the bus route home from karate with a take-out dinner, and silly things like quick comebacks and weird things like my blog being quoted back to me. "I have a photographic memory" he told me yesterday. And you know, that's kind of weird, but I don't mind... cuz there's someone who knows the "backstory" and I really don't have to go back and explain why I'm strange.

Yesterday he picked us up from the Sun's violin camp (filled with lots of schoolfolk... while I was trying to be incognito and get in the car, Bigbear had come over to the car to say hi in her usual expansive and exuberant way, calling attention to herself-- and we were noticed by OneHalf and family. Not that I care, really, but it's kinda funny) to take us up to Karate. On the ride up, The Tomcat said to the Sun "You know me and your mom have been hanging out a lot, and I think she's really cool. Do you mind if I take her out on a date?" The Sun grinned and said "I don't care" but later he told me he didn't care cuz he knows Tomcat really well (I told you it was awfullyclosetohome) and so wasn't afraid that Tomcat would steal him when I wasn't looking. And plus, he now has someone to play video games with when I'm busy working. And after a little while he put his head on the Tomcat's arm and pinched him several times.

Who knew. Certainly not the direction I was looking in... and half of me goes along with the flow but the other half of me has wild moments of sheer and total panic.

We've had some interesting conversations, The Tomcat and I... and everyone's cards are pretty much on the table. I'm not into sharing... I'm just not, and the Tomcat tendencies could freak me out after awhile but for the moment I'm OK.

And we're going to Vegas together after we drop the Sun off...

Here am I floating round my tin can
Far above the moon
Planet earth is blue
And there's nothing I can do.

So there you have it...


professor said…
how freakin cool is that...I've been keeping quiet and staying out the way to let the dust settle...sorry, but I get the sense this is for a while...don't ask why, but I felt that way since MMB was in 6th grade and I said "ooo, theres a fuzzy for a fuzzy mother" to bigbear...then we found out he was attached to the schoollady...
I really enjoyed getting uptown in 2 minutes flat...sitting back and enjoying the wind in my face as the scenery whizzed by...I have never seen you so relaxed and happy...your hand glued...he complained but didn't pull away...I spent the night observing...every move, gesture, word, will be rough sometimes, but I get the feeling I got when I looked at choclahontas and knew we would have her forever...
I know you hate the phrase "take one day at a time" but that's all I can say for we are not promised babygirl totally enjoy today...
love ya sis
Argh I left a comment yesterday but the blogsphere ate it. Now after your last post, that comment seems wrong but still...

This post made me smile for you. I know you´re cautious and that´s cool but you know you sound happy. More you sound like you´re enjoying yourself.

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