My First Day As SingleMom of Two Boys

...sucked and I failed miserably, arriving at work at 9:40. Not that I don't have trouble arriving at work at 9:40 with only One Boy; I am, after all, Chronically Late.

And to be fair, I set up myself up, starting with last night. I got to the boys' daycamp location yesterday at about 5:45P, and instead of coming right home like a responsible Single Mother, I stopped in De Janeiro on Lex. Savvy New York Shoppers know about this place; it's been in the same spot on Lex, right above the entrance to Grand Central Station, for years. Probably 20, because it was there when I was a 20-something Single Gal shopper. This is a feat in and of itself... and add to that fact that they *still* have great (designer) shoes at discount prices, as well as tons of other stuff, it's an addiction. But you have to a.) be in the mood to dig, b.) be efficient and c.) know your brands. I rarely get downtown anymore since I live WellOffTheBeatenPath, and work on the upper east side. But we passed right by it on the way to the subway, and the temptation was just too great. So, $40 off the debit card (1 Esprit halter polka-dot dress that *perfectly* matches my cute little Girlie-Bag purchase the other day, 1 t-shirt/tunic and 1 cute little off the shoulder trendy top) and about as many minutes later, we headed home.

But that put us back on the Rock close to 8P, which made the hotdog and salad dinner close to 9P (by the time I changed clothes and collected my thoughts) which got the boys bedtime close to 10P and of course, it was the first night as "adopted brothers" so they were slow going to sleep.

And I'm still not sleeping, so getting up was a struggle, and I thought that actually we were doing OK since we made the 7:30 bus with ease. And that even included me getting two lunches packed and equipment all checked out. But we should have been on the 7:10, because we got to the daycamp site just as the Moon's escort was leaving for the his location (his program is not in the same place as the Sun's). So if I had only been a Single Parent to One, I would have made it to work with time to spare, but NO! I had to haul-ass to get the Moon down to lower Third Ave. I had the wrong walking shoes on which meant I had to take the bus downtown and that was the WRONG THING TO DO. Traffic in the Big Apple truly sucks. There are just way too many fucking people driving. Why do they drive??? You really don't get anywhere any faster, you clog up traffic, wreak havoc on the environment and slow down the damn buses! Professor!

So I get the Moon to his location, and then because I had on the wrong damn shoes for walking I dreaded walking back to the Lex Ave subway so jumped on a bus. Which crawled in more traffic until it passed midtown.

Boss only partially chewed me out. He has to, since he's my boss, and I respectfully take it but shit I have NOTHING to do here, so really what's the point? I was SO tempted to just call in sick and hike around midtown... but I had on the wrong damn shoes for walking.

But this morning is the type of morning that sends me into a funk, because I actually was *trying* to be efficient and get here, and because I couldn't, the voices took turns shouting out all the other things I can't do; can't find a partner worth their salt, can't get organized, can't sleep, can't control my own damn destiny and can't do any work.

Yeah yeah yeah, I know. You don't have to say anything cuz I pretty much said it to myself, and the voices backed off. And I'm not in a funk. Not in a "completely-non-functioning" funk, anyway, just a mildly "lazy-ass" way.


JFK reports that Big Bear has landed!!!! 2:41 NY time. The Prof just interrupted my posting to pick up gas money, then go pick up MoodMagicBarbie and head out to JFK.

My mommy's coming home! I can cry and fall apart now....


SewPaula said…
So glad that your mama will be home soon -- hugs to you!
Julie said…
I'm so happy for all of you that bigbear is back and the family is complete again.

You did not fail miserably as a single mother of 2. Sounds to me like you did an admirable job for your first day.

I am frequently on my own with 2 and let me tell you - it's HARD. I know this is made quadruply difficult by the fact that I often have NO PLAN. I had it fairly together with one - I generally had a plan and when I didn't it was easy to fly by the seat of my pants. With 2 a plan is essential - except I'm usually two damn tired to come up with one.

So, if you have half a plan and get through the day with everyone alive, relatively cared for and safe then you should consider yourself TRIUMPHANT!

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