Wondering Again

...what the point is... reminds me of a psalm, 90 to be exact. Where Moses lists all the frailties of life.

Mine is... as I've wondered before, what is the point of even wanting to be in a relationship? Maybe the skaters and the dabblers have it right. It will end anyway.

A couple of friends of mine are all wondering at the status of their relationships today. One is even thinking it's over, though I can't say I see that yet. You never know how the human heart turns.

But what makes me sad is... if they can't get it right, if no one gets it right these days, then what hope is there for me? What makes me so special, that I could end up with something no one else has?

Blech.

A million lonely souls.

Just makes me so unhopeful.

Comments

Ros said…
Not a million lonely souls, a bunch of us are happily single and heart-whole. I think good relationships are the exception, not the rule.
The Bear Maiden said…
Yeah, there are a bunch of happily single folk, though I don't know too many. At one time I was one of them, and clearly remember trying to dissuade a freind of mine who wanted to be married. But I've changed my mind since then... and what disturbs me is that it seems such a fleeting thing. Cuz in the world I grew up in, relationships lasted... not necessarily "good"... but a commitment existed to make them work somehow.
Julie said…
As one of those friends whose relationship has fallen apart - I'm sorry to say they don't last. I can't say I really believe in relationships anymore. I certainly don't want to be in one ever again. Too much work, too little reward - at least that's been my experience.

And not just my experience. The two couples that were my role models for everything a marriage should be, started to come apart this year. One is likely to end in divorce and the other seems to be headed towards a shell of a marriage to avoid what would be an ugly divorce because of the vindictive nature of one of the spouses.

I think it's amazingly rare when couples can navigate the inherent problems of relationships for the long haul. And I'm not really certain it's worth it.

I will gladly enter the ranks of happily single.
The Bear Maiden said…
Yeah but FatLady I'm not convinced yours is truly over. For a bunch of reasons, none of which you see right now or would hear if I told you. Changing it is, most certainly...but that's not a bad thing. If I were a betting woman I'd be holding out as long as I can to watch the odds a little longer.

The thing is... my role models for relationships, my parents, have lasted 46 years. Not always easy. It didn't always work. They endured things that most people would have thrown in the towel over -- EASILY... Probably if they were going through those things in this time, they wouldn't have made it... but would they have been wrong?

I know another couple who went through a major rough patch a few years back. I'm amazed they stayed together. The thing they both had in common was parents who had also stayed married. For a minute no one thought they would make it...

Actually, the strongest couples I know are the ones everyone betted against. Go figure.

So I wonder, I really do.

It's like cooking. There's a spice in the mix that's subtle and elusive but makes all the difference in the outcome.

But it also seems odd to me that the ones who want to work things out don't seem to end up with the same kind, and I wonder why that is.
Babz Rawls Ivy said…
I am forever hopeful.
I am a lover and a dreamer. I own hope.
Anonymous said…
You young folk got to realize, relationships about friendship, is the dude your friend? No romance, sex, it is what it is and not always holy shit experience. Friendship, cooperation, sharing the load and knowing when you get old and toothless and wear depends that your friend will be there, out of, friendship ,companionship. It's not like TV or the movies, real life, dull boring ugly and REAL

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